2017 - May

05/01

May I?

I've used that one before, but I don't know if anyone used it before me. Probably. You can check my blog for the reference date if you wish, but I'm not posting it there again. I've used it once. It's over-used. All new creativity there. Always. Sort of. Not really...

It's a new month though, and so far it feels like a good start. I'm still catching up with projects, but maybe I shouldn't say 'catching up' but instead 'continually working on'. That sounds a lot better. Less stressful. More progressive.

Time to get working projects again...

05/02

Monday passed, so there's a new Madchild track waiting for me in my feed! Dope music is always. Badchild. That and something a bit further in by Wreckonize (I wonder how many people will catch these puns off the date I type them).

It's always a good morning when there's time for music, so this morning's a good one! With a cup of tea and Ice Cubes in it. Streams of sound flowing to my head; keeping me on edge, positive and always moving. Onward. Nothing inspires as a little brainstorm! A little something for the sinus. Bang your head.

05/03

I didn't really know I knew who Zara Larsson was before someone told me I did. Of course I'd heard her music before!! When I planned my first summer trip up North (first of June) I knew her concert would be playing that very day, and I still booked that day thinking I wouldn't be missing anything special... man, she'll be the highlight concert of the year. My mistake. Too late to re-book, but maybe some other year, when the hype's died down a bit and... it probably won't be the same thing ever again! The ENERGY! Oh well...

05/04

I went to my first concert of the year today! The Cardigans. They played at Gröna Lund in front a somewhat-more-than-usual packed crowd, and though I wasn't really feeling their energy at first... they did have a few more intense tracks! Got head-bobbing for real towards the end, though their Favorite Game - saved for encore, wasn't all as amazing as I remembered it. Still was a show worth going to, but I was expecting a bit more awesome. Maybe a different style of music than they are. But they are who they are. Not bad.

05/05

No concert today. It's a boy band today. Sort of. I went past a comic book shop on the way from work though, and traded in a bag of manga for... some more manga! :D Manga I've been missing, and a batter of cheaper comics on the side, because I could use some additional reading. Well, actually I couldn't. I have comics enough to last me all year, they've been piling up and I rarely have time to read them, but it can't hurt to just have a few more... can it? A few more piles: a few more smiles.

05/06

So I've been neglecting this place for a few days again! That's just how it goes when time is a running out, and other tasks keep taking priority, and when night falls you don't have the gusto (that means energy right?) to focus on the things you should be focusing on, and instead turn to video clips in the name of research, and music, and movies, and you know how it goes... I tell myself they're an integral part of my accomplishments rather than just a diversion though. Because I review them, but really... we're all just very easily distracted.

05/07

We were supposed to have guests over today, but looks like they canceled last minute. Sick. I'm not sure if I'm more relieved (it just really feels like a Sunday kind of day), or disappointed (because at the same time I know forced social events do get me in higher spirits), but hey, it's a Sunday! I'm about to go out for a short walk, and then get back to the computer and do things like usual, and maybe some of it will be good! It's the day it is, so there's no pressure either way, but course I will.

05/08

So I caught a cold. Damn.

I'm still in the sore throat phase, but it feels like it's fading a bit. Maybe the surplus of vitamins and other alternate stuff I'm eating is starting to have an effect, but I'm taking it easy today anyway. Going to bed to read a bit once I finish this short piece.

I guess going jogging yesterday wasn't my wisest decision, cause I was feeling a bit tired already. I slept long, but didn't relate the tiredness to anything else than... well, tiredness.

Gotta listen to the body though! Right now: it says rest.

05/09

Second day of my cold days, and today... I'm really feeling the cold. I went through the whole shivers and fever phase last night, and I'm currently in the sniffles and coughing, and with a little rest hopefully I'll be out of this stage too tomorrow. Always too easy to stop taking the rest you need in this stage though, when only burning eyes and a sniffle tells you you should probably go to bed a bit. No sore throat. No cold feet. No headache. Nothing to force you into bed, but: that's where you should be. Time to rest...

05/10

Third day of my cold days today, and I'm feeling... pretty OK! Still a bit tired, still a bit sweaty, but now without the sniffle and surplus sneezes: nose starts running randomly instead, and my irritated throat is now in the stage of cough-potential. Eyes are tired, but maybe that's because I've been sitting by the computer a while now... overall I'm feeling a lot better, but I sound sick so that means I am, right?

I hope three days indoors is enough, and tomorrow it's work as usual... but probably no concert! Better not say Hey in advance...

05/11

Looks like three days rest just wasn't enough! I'm on my fourth one right now, but how about we make it five? That's the deadline.

I'm actually feeling a bit worse today than yesterday - in weirder ways. Maybe I took too much supplements yesterday. Maybe I'm going past the threshold of what my body needs/can handle. Maybe I did too much. Maybe lifting weights just a few time before bed wasn't the wisest thing to do.

I woke up with a headache on just one side. Sinuses. Damn. It cleared up eventually, but I still feel a bit off. Had trouble breathing. Tried inhaling some eucalyptus. Tea. Enzyme spray. Maybe all I really need to try is rest. More. Sleep all day.

05/12

Femte dagen gillt!

'Tredje gången gillt' translates to 'third time's the charm', but this doesn't really work outside the threes. Seems we have different sayings for the same number, but what am I saying? I'm still sick. Not so bad now. Cough. Sniffle. If I don't totally do something to mess things up today it feels like I could have it on a tolerable level for the grand even tomorrow, so I'd better shape up! Rest up! Not sit here and write all too much even though it's hard to just lie in bed and do nothing! Good day.

05/13

Sixth day aaand I guess I'm OK! Still sniffles, but not enough to get in the way of a grand tour of Gröna Lund and all their attractions. I still didn't give the two most intense ones a go, but all the rest many times over, and it was a blast. A blast from the past too, like a repeat of last time I was there with a couple new introductions... and I feel like I should've tried something new. More than cotton candy, the shooting range and fish n chip... but maybe next time. It was a great day.

05/14

The day after... and man am I tired! I mean my back was so sore yesterday I thought I'd wake up with lumbago, but I did some exercises before I went to sleep yesterday, and I guess I did the right ones. It went well. It was fun. It's a bit melancholy having good guests leave but.. it happens. Feels like me and my big brother and growing a bit more distant, with different interests and uses of time, but it's still great to see him, and my nephew's the one I play all the more games with. Good day.

05/15

I still got sniffles... but it's alright!

Feels like this is what I'll be speaking about for the rest of this month though. Until it blows over at least, but considering how much I'm up and running right now it feels like that might be a while. I feel good though, it's just my nose that's running. I'm walking for now. Taking it easy. Hoping it blows over soon and continuing to pound my body with nutrients.

I was at work today, and that went alright. I mean it didn't go bad at all. I mean it was like usual.

05/16

What is my purpose in life? Or should I say: what is my porpoise? I'm like a tortoise in life... so slow, but I'm moving! Like a circus.

I'm trying to work through life, but is it worth it?

I'm trying to get something from the Earth, but do I deserve it?

Mother Earth is dying and instead of either crying,or doing something about it, I write my own papyrus, and eat papayas, and let the days pass till they're right by us. And gain bias. And buy dust. Like a car it drives us... on!! I think I've done...

Nothing wrong.

05/17

Just have to fill in a few days, because they're all passing way faster than I thought they would! I was at the cinema today, and fortunately managed the hexa list scan while I was away, because I came home after midnight, so it was just a quick dinner and straight to bed, and before that it was work, so that's really all I've been doing y'all. It's everything all at once, as always, during this time before the most intense time of the year: summer. Work. Museum. Fate of the FURIOUS! Then back home to eat and sleep. Night.

05/18

Then we were invited away! Eating. Playing Yahtzy. Dad came straight from the city (borrowed my card) so I borrowed the car, and drove us to the location. We at good food. Played Yahtzy. Drove back home somewhere around seven and weren't hungry for dinner at all... but had a small one anyway. We had lunch before we left too - a tiny one, so some people barely had room for tea... such is the way! Just eating: all day. In all ways. In hallways. Here we go y'all. I think it's time for a quick bedtime snack... been good. Night.

05/19

And today I went bowling! Work too, before that. My cousin was sick though, so I had to call in a buddy last-minute, but he thought it'd be fun (little did he know I'd win all the rounds HAHAHA) so: we got some snacks, and a track, and bowled for almost one hour and a half even though we just had the one, really. I wonder what kind of computerized systems they had over there. But it was fun. It was also probably the warmest day of May. I mean it was HOT. Shorts and T-shirts. Good day.

05/20

Finally a day free! Saturday. When you sit down. Just sat a day. That's what I've been doing. By the computer, mostly, though I plan to get out and grab a bit of fresh air too. It's cloudy, but fresh, cool - not as stagnant and hard to breath as it was yesterday. Summer's closing in with leaps and bounds and I feel like I need to get a move on now. I need to get in shape. I need to get healthy. I need to eat more, and rest more, and move more, and: do more online! Summer's coming soon...

05/21

My nervousness is reaching peak levels lately. Too much going on at the same time, I think. I grow weary. I sleep longer, yet sleep less. I overthink. Thoughts go into my brain and spin around a while, and don't seem to find their way out. It's like that feeling you get before a long-planned trip, just a day or two before it, or more... and then when it's finally time to travel you feel great. Calm. Relaxed. Excited. Why the surplus stress before such events?! Wish I could avoid the angst, and just exhilarate. Accelerate. The great race.

05/22

Another day! Another rush. Another run around the block. Another phase of going back and forth, and getting things done, and accomplishing a little but never as much as I'd like to. Another eve of a new sun rising. Another fade. Another demise... end. Another promise of new things exciting! I don't know if I want bliss. I don't know what's enticing. When I see the sun burning bright on the horizon I wonder if it's truly beauty... or if the world's in fever, and our pollution cutting too deep. Red like blood. Red, beautiful, sunset. Sinking down. Good day.

05/23

Oh man... so many days left over from days long passed, in the constant ebb and flow of time, and stress, and time, and stress, and time... filler beckons, but I resist. I just want to get it over with. I want to finish this month so I can start a new chapter in my life. New writings. New plans. New projects. New responsibilities. New goals. New visions. New activities. New work. New things but without leftovers, and things I know I should do that I haven't done, that keep gnawing on my mind, and eating me up inside. Chews.

05/24

I chews you: bubble gum.

I could chew you all day. I could write until my fingers bleed, or my fingerprints wear off, or until either my fingers wear off entirely or grow strong like chiseled bone, and let me type through the eons, if I so learn to live. If modern science catches up and grants me my early childhood wish: to live till I'm a hundred!

Although I'm no longer sure I wish to live that long.

What's a good life if you don't live good? I guess I lived good as a kid. Hopefully I still can.

05/25

This was the first day of that vacation I had last month... I mean this month. I rode up to Sundsvall on Wednesday night with my buddy Bear, and we couch surfed on an actual couch, in a small but cozy apartment in Sundsvall, and then he went to mass, and I found a nice second hand shop and bought a souvenir, and we ate lunch on a mountain (Norrberget), and headed onwards towards the place we were going: a little, isolated little place out in the wilds but... not as isolated as I thought. Right by the road, but...

05/26

Beautiful.

In the distance you could see snowy mountain tops. The lake, and wilderness spread out still and eerie in an early morning mist, but the sunshine warmed up the scenery, even if the wind for some reason never started to blow.

We wandered around the woods and water by Kvarnvattnet, and then rode to Hällingsåfallet along a gravel path said to house the biggest bear population in Sweden (they have tours), and took a trip to Norway too, and ate some really really expensive ice cream.

I had a headache so I went to bed early but...

05/27

It was great.

And the day after wasn't any worse! We took a trip to a recently excavated military outpost in... I forget the name. We toured the bunkers there, then stopped by the local shop on the way back, and we were in Gäddinge yesterday too, btw, a nice little village.

My buddy's a bit religious so we checked out some churches too. Played games. Fired up the sauna. Had a good dinner, and no headache today but Bear was super tired so he went to sleep early instead.

Final day tomorrow, or, this was the last but...

05/28

...this was the real final one. Up at 5:30. No time for breakfast. I packed the car cause buddy Bear had a headache this time. We ate ice cream for breakfast on the way (it wouldn't last all the way back to Stockholm), and stopped by Sundsvall for an hour on the way, ate lunch in Hudiksvall, and were back in Bro just in time for dinner! Intense trip. But fun. But kinda tiring. But... not bad. But a bundle of impressions, and adventure, lack of sleep but at least one day's surplus... I'll savor the good things. Ciao.

05/29

Ciao like Mando Diao. Like it's just an artist name. Like a word. Like it could mean the world but it could also not mean that much... time's closing in for dinner but I sit here and write these things anyway because I'd decided to catch up, and so I will. I will write this, I will watch that stuff, and I will book my ticket... a bit later.

Plans for summer. It's that time. But the only cheap ticket is for a plane that leaves 8:30 in the morning, which would mean I'd need to get up around 5... which is a bit earlier than I'm used to getting up! But...

05/30

...it's weird how the words sometimes run out so much quicker than the paragraphs make it seem like they've run. Like they did yesterday.

Plane ticket still needs to be booked. The problem is I might get called up for work one or two extra weeks in August, and if I do I might get two more weeks vacation in September, so I can't book that trip. The August trips... should I book those? Maybe just one? It's cheap at the time of writing but might not be for long... I guess I'll book the first, then see what happens.

05/31

It's weird how things make more sense when you write about them, too.

I'd been thinking about the ticket thing for what feels like forever, but finally just fixed in, and now it's done, and I can move on. I wish all decisions were so easy.

Maybe I should write about more of them. Get back to my start-the-day-writing practice, and leave the mess on paper so I can begin each day with a clean slate. It'd be nice. It was. It worked, sometimes. Not always, but enough to merit the exercise.

Kept the pen moving, too.