2022 - August

August 1, 2022

Life up North is so amazing.

Just picture this.

You wake up well-rested. It's dark in the room, but your well-adjusted eyes can still see the contours of the slanted wooden ceiling and open room via the little light that seeps in around the light-cancelling plastic curtains, that wave a bit in the wind. The window's open and a cool breeze blows though. It's always blowing.

You get up on creaking floorboards, pull up the curtain, and get hit with a wall of warmth and light.

You look at the tree line that ways in the wind, and the blue lake...

August 2, 2022

...and your eyes slowly adjust to the new day.

A few stray clouds sit in the blue sky, but they don't seem to pose a threat.

You jump into the clothes that hang on the side of the bed, or are lined up on the smaller bed on the opposite side of the room, currently vacant since your nephew's down South again, at work with his company again.

You open the cover to the door and fasten it with a thin bit of rope. There's a small loop that fastens around the head of a nail. It latches on on the second try...

August 3, 2022

...and you walk down the stairs, that have steps with uneven sizes after passionate but somewhat sub-par carpentry on behalf of the previous owner, and really oughta get a handrail one of these days. It'd be good for the folks. Personally you run these stairs so much you can run them in the dark too without getting tripped up.

The secret is to feel the edges of each step with your toes, and curl them around the edge of each one as you descend.

If the toes don't curl around the edge you know you need to recalibrate.

Going up is easier.

August 4, 2022

In the kitchen breakfast awaits on the table.

Glass jars with muesli and whole-food powders, and fresh strawberry jam from the garden, or whole berries if they're in season.

Most get sent to the freezer, but we keep a little in the fridge for breakfasts and deserts. During most of July we have fresh strawberries every day, and towards the end of it blueberries and raspberries. And then currents - red and black.

Two tasks await before breakfast though: a quick dip in the lip, and a little toothbrushing.

You open the door and walk out barefoot, three steps to the grass...

August 5, 2022

The water's cold, but wakes you up the best possible way, and you get some sun on the way down. You stop by the outdoor bathroom first.

It's not the most fragrant little room but the ventilation's good, and it works well. All waste gets turned back into dirt; recycled for the fields.

If you got up earlier the lake would be still, but at this time the waves are crossing the surface in a steady stream, and the Northern wind feels icy on your way out.

You take a quick dip, and jump up, and then go back for a swim...

August 6, 2022

You get up and dry yourself, and brush your teeth barefoot on the lawn, and then fix up a plate of breakfast, and a cup of cold coffee from the previous day, and look out the windows as you eat.

The kitchen's bright, and the shadows of branches outside the windows cast light silhouettes on the walls, that move with the wind, and make you feel like the entire house is one with the world outside.

Whenever you're done it's time to get out and tame the day. You eat quickly and appreciatively. No time to sit inside when it's summer.

August 7, 2022

On the drive to the airport I was speaking to our neighboring chauffeur about plane delays. She asked if I'd had any lately, and I said that fortunately I don't think I've had any delays at all in maybe a year or so now. On the contrary flights seem to arrive early. As I said it I was thinking I hope I'm not jinxing myself right now but it is the truth, I haven't any troubles in a bit...

The flight got delayed some ~40 minutes.

But it was alright. Cousin David met up with an ice cream and we rode home.

Not too late.

August 8, 2022

I'm back. From the wild. With a mild... panic.

Coolant hose in the engine exploded on the way to work. On the highway. I didn't even notice. I thought I might've driven over a water bottle or something. it said BANG and some liquid sprayed up from what seemed to be under the front of the car, but was apparently the engine.

I started suspecting it was coolant when I stopped at a red light and there seemed to be a little water vapor from the engine...

Then the temperature started rising, a warning triangle showed and I pulled over.

August 9, 2022

Engine trouble isn't fun. Cooling system trouble isn't either.

Even less fun is if it's potentially both...

And I don't know exactly what the problem is, or how many essential car components it encompasses.

I managed to drive home anyway. A workshop near the office managed to replace the hose, and fill in new coolant, and get it all circulating again but then... the temperature started rising again, and the engine isn't running seamlessly. A 'check engine' error's appeared on the panel too, and these things are currently; collectively stressing me out!

Repairs are expensive. That's why. Primarily. Secondarily...

I need that car.

August 10, 2022

Cars. Cars, man! Cars... I tell you!

Let me tell you about cars.

If you thought you could just buy a car and have a good time with it and maybe sell it for a bit more than you bought it for: quit dreaming.

If you can't solve issues that might come your way yourself, then either you'll be paying serious money to get things fixed, or you'll need to learn, or you're better off with no car, because the one thing a car is not is an investment.

Unless you sell right away, or repair yourself: can't turn a profit on a car.

August 11, 2022

Took a trip out to Elfviks Gård today, to clear my mind, and spend some time in the sun and water, and to cash-in a gift I'd been given last Christmas: the full Elfviks Gård experience, including a tour of animals and estate, a lunch and coffee/ice cream, and a cooling bath in the nearby blue; oceanic surf.

It was nice, but I can't seem to get my mind entirely off of my car troubles... and I'm not sure I will until I get it fixed, which might be a while, cause I have trips.

Ah well. It's just a car; it's just money...

August 12, 2022

Final day of work for the week, phew.

I'm sitting here with a fan on. I have other fans, too. It's nice. We're not connected right now, though, because I am 'officially' still on summer vacation.

I tried starting the car real quick... and it didn't sound too good.

The check engine light is still burning bright on the panel, it seems there's some liquid coolant in the engine fuse box, and my main guy when it comes to fixing stuff like this is possibly on vacation...

I don't think I want to drive this car anywhere.

What do y'all.

August 13, 2022

Had kinda a headache again.

I ignored it. I went shopping. I cleaned the house. And eventually it disappeared, thanks to possibly coffee, the cold morning shower and a bit more focus on breathing and posture - as you do when you feel something like this coming on.

I'm proud I don't let little things like this totally incapacitate me though, as I maybe used to. But maybe it was worse. Maybe my magnesium intake reduces the tension further. Maybe these headaches just never get so bad now.

And every now and then: it's not so bad to rest a bit after all.

August 14, 2022

Been out at murky Ösby lake today, swimming with the sharks!

Oh I mean carps. Slightly kinder.

I stood in the shallow water by the pier for a while seeing if I could maybe interact with some of them, and they did start nibbling on my feet, slurping some dry skin (some people pay for these things - fish pedicure - look it up), but even though they made their way a bit further upwards and all the way to my left knee, I couldn't see a thing. Too murky.

They're social though I hear. Maybe next time I'll get a glimpse.

August 15, 2022

My nephew's visiting.

He's an optimistic and dedicated individual. An energetic entrepreneur. The kind of guy who goes to a meeting in the morning and stays there until midnight, and catches the last ride home, and still wants to go back for another round the next day! Early morning once more.

It's inspiring. I think he's a good influence on me. Gets me to focus on my own work while he's here, though my thoughts do occasionally drift to ponderings on how late it might get tonight; when he's coming home...

I hope he's not burning his candle too much.

August 16, 2022

I'm not thinking about that car no more.

It'll be fixed or it won't be fixed. It doesn't matter much now.

I've no time. I've not the monetary surplus to spend too much on it either, though wouldn't it be nice if you had your own personal garage - or open outdoor property - where you could worst-case-scenario dismantle a a vehicle to at least get some good money on the parts. Living mid-city is so limiting. Even the suburbs are. This isn't mid-city at all.

I have been looking into transport costs, and those aren't dandy either.

Cars... expensive man. Expensive man = cars.

August 17, 2022

My nephew left this morning.

I woke up somewhere after 6 AM, though didn't get up until 6:30 when he was intentionally brushing his teeth loudly in the closest bathroom, as to wake me up if I hadn't already. It worked! I guess. Considerate.

I locked the door and said goodbye and went back to sleep, and a regular workday followed...

I think I did manage to slumber for a few more hours too. Though I'm not certain. I drifted in and out a bit, but I feel awake today. More than yesterday.

Best some coffee and just keep going.

August 18, 2022

So I'm back, I am. Back at work. Back at the regular old biz. Ness. The shiznit. Yo know what it is yes.

It went alright. But I'm commuting now. With commuter train. And bus. Two busses. Compared to the car trips I used to take before the car broke down it takes too long. Twice as long. But it did also cost about twice as much - maintenance and repair costs of owning a car not considered - so on the bright side I'm saving a lot of $$$ living like this.

I'm starting to understand why Buddy Bear didn't buy a new one...

August 19, 2022

Did I tell you about the time...

I'm sure I did. About how it's flying. All the time. Oh my days. All the days. Even on the... holidays.

I really wish I could live multiple lives, but not alternative ones where each one was a new experience, but one long one where I could collect insights and impressions to the point I really feel complete. Satisfied and satiated on what this world has to offer.

Maybe I will when I'm old though. Maybe this one life is more than enough really... it just does not feel like it now.

Those wishes. Careful.

August 20, 2022

Ah whoops. I think I wrote about the wrong day yesterday. That was next week. I'm filling in days here like they're leftover ones in my diary, and sometimes I time they wrong, there's just so much going on these days!

This day: I spent time with a buddy. It wasn't work at all yesterday, and it wasn't the work day I thought it was before it either. Though it was a work day, and then a travel day, and then I was back with the madness.

But the gladness. The close to nature and living lavish.

Ah. I miss this already.

August 21, 2022

I miss being out in the wild and free, where I like to be, where my stripes are Z, where I'm wild and free - oh wait I said that already - where like ice I breath, where little mice scurry around down by the tree, and where the squirrels prance above it, nature's dance I love it, I fell in love one day and now I think of nothing but it. Nothing but it and butts. Huh?

Ah well. Summer time. I live the live and I feel some I shine.

Some days. Always. Hallways. No way. I be outside only.

August 22, 2022

Distance work today. From a cozy little guesthouse by the lake. Where I hastily arranged a work station on a little table by a sofa by a window overlooking the lake, the wireless modem placed where the cover's best, at the edge of the window. The sun shone on i for a while. It didn't overheat, fortunately.

I've been sitting here all day, typing away, doing the things I usually do when I do the work I do do. All my dues dude. I'm a deuce deus. Whatever that means. Ex. Machina. Heya.

Anyway it feels good to be up here. Work albeit.

August 23, 2022

Back to Stockholm on a week day! Between work days. Who would've known you could prolong your vacation time like this.

I got to the airport in good time. I sat there with a good book for a while. I closed my eyes for a moment on the plane, and here we go again. Back in Stockholm.

Third time's the charm.

Back in Stockholm.

I'm not really charmed though by being back in Stockholm.

I'd really rather avoid being here. I'd like to move North. I wish I could bring bits of my family with me, and a friend or two...

For now it's Bro.

August 24, 2022

SRS is a pretty cool game. Wish I had more time to play it.

I wish I had played it back when I was a teen too, because there is certain video material there that I am certain I would've appreciated even more back then. And the game too. When the graphics and mechanics were a bit more modern than now.

But about those videos. Every once in a while you run across a lady in the game, who usually challenges you to a car-based objective to impress her. If you manage she becomes your girl, and certain... material follows.

August 25, 2022

Haven't had a day as stressful as this one in some time! But I managed, and that's what matters innit?

I didn't just manage either. I managed well. I missed a train on the way back from work, and I dropped a glass jar in the floor while I was on my way too it - it shattered in a million pieces, but I made up for it when I got back, I combed the floor and threw the glass in the trash and washed the dishes bitches and went to bed in... decent time.

Tomorrow: I'll be up before nine.

August 26, 2022

5:20 AM, ugh...

I would've had to get up even earlier though if my sister hadn't wanted to tag along, and booked in an a couple spots on Arlanda Express for us, to shave off a few morning hours. On her part many hours. On my part not that long, since I'd have to first travel in to Stockholm City to catch the express train to the airport there. But compared to the train and bus ride I'd otherwise be taking - via Bålsta, the closest transit location - it did give me about half an hour respite.

So that's nice. But ugh. Still early.

August 27, 2022

It rained... for a moment. Not that long really. I made it seem like longer when I crept upstairs to read a bit wile minimal raindrops pelted the grass (not books but Ginza catalogs actually - I'm going through them looking for suitable movies to watch - and what-not), and stayed there a while past the rainfall...

Doesn't feel like optimal use of my time. Feels like I could make better use of it. Feels like when I'm up here I better be outside. As much as I can. No excuses.

But I have been kinda tired and... it was nice.

If only it had rained longer.

August 28, 2022

Picking black currents today. Lots and lots of black currents. Pots and pots of black currents. For shots and shots of black currents. Every morning. With an allotment of muesli and... other good things.

I picked a bundle really. Made good use of the hours. Spent it to the most of my power. Didn't get devoured by books. I kept it A. Whatever that means. I repped today. I am yet ablaze. Don't forget my name!!!

It's Cyberdevil. Or if that sounds too edgy: Bob. I wonder about my alias sometimes. Twas chosen at whim. Does it chase people away...

August 29, 2022

I'm up North... but I guess I can still write a bit.

I've made it a bit of a principle to never use the computer up here, and usually I adhere to this rule. Ironclad. Of utmost important if I'm to truly make my most of my time up in the wild and free, but when the darkness comes early, and there are yet a few hours in the day left to use, and I have no better way to spend them...

Well why not spend them here? I ave no good argument for avoidal.

Best write when I can.

August 30, 2022

It's cold up here.

I had to swap blankets today. From the cotton wool one to on of feather, and suddenly it was too warm instead. I think I need something inbetween. Another kind of feather. Something to match the weather. Something for when it's really really old somewhere around 4-5 AM, but not that cold before or after.

It's August though, still.

Is it really supposed to be like this? It doesn't feel like it should be autumn just yet. And yet the leaves are turning yellow and blowing off the trees too...

It's too early I tell ya.

August 31, 2022

Going to Kangos tomorrow. *fingers crossed!*

It's the little town where mom grew up, and where grandma lived, and where I remember being for a large part of my summer upbringing as well.

I used to help out with the woodwork and what-not. Now mom's sister takes care of grandma's house, and they're coming up tomorrow. We have our own little cottage there, and a lot of woodwork of our own, and I absolutely want to at least spend a day there before I leave, so...

Tomorrow it is! I hope it goes well.

Hope I sleep.

I'll be driving.