2022 - May

May 1, 2022

I'll be getting up around 3:30 AM the Monday after next. To catch a direct bus to the airport at 4:05. I'll be back in Stockholm around 8, and at work a couple hours later. Hope to rest up a bit during the flights and bus rides, so hopefully I can do my dues diligently after that.

After that particular day it'll all calm down. No uncertain sleep times, or new locations, and for another couple weeks I'll just be doing what I usually do do then...

Woke up a bit too early today already. Anticipating the trip.

Calm down.

May 2, 2022

Sorted out some tax stuff for my sister today! Started out alright, but it does get monotone quick! She served up dinner and chatted a bit, and around three hours later I hopped in the car and headed onward home - home around midnight.

I just have a couple more days after this before my trip, and since some dues are yet undone it's starting to stress me out a bit, yet I'm impressed by how calm it seems I manage to make myself when I have things to do.

You just... do them. Don't think about the future. Live now.

May 3, 2022

I thought I might be selling a weight vest today, but the buyer backed down. He was interested yesterday. No longer. I guess when you have an opportunity you'd best take it fast! Though getting home after 11 PM probably ruined my chances there. Not much choice.

Oh well. Profit's the same no matter what day I sell it! It should be alright. For now it's time to straggle on, and get some other dues done for the day.

And maybe I can pack a bit too. Would be reassuring to not have that left for the very last minute.

May 4, 2022

Fourth of May! The 'may the fours be with you' day.

I forgot to blog about it this year.

Not that I always do, but on the days I have remembered about it I think I have. Alas, not this one. Instead I was probably stressing to get ready for the trip ahead, for which I've yet to fill in my daily wording. As usual travel time is hurdling obstacles my way with great unnerving...

I get what we like to call here a case of the 'travel fever'. When you're just unnecessarily stressed. Can't really focus.

It's all about that trip...

May 5, 2022

This was the day I ventured away...

From the cityscapes. From the gray and dry or slimy, to the blimey wilds, to the free energy up there, to my inner child! To the winds of whim. Let all things begin. let us smile. But for a while...

I want to sing something! I want to shine and rise! I want to eye the skies! I want my time sublime! I want to find my peace. I want to feel at ease. I want to wine and dine. Come climb come climb.

Really it's been awesome. But if you climb a mountain: caution.

May 6, 2022

It's crazy how fast the snow melts.

When I came here it pretty much coated the front lawn entirely, and today the mounds have maybe reduced by half. They're shrinking fast. And it seems the water's pretty much getting sucked up by the ground entirely.

I've been walking around in clumsy boots since you need them up here, as to not have your shows soaking wet after your first misstep through sloshy snow into a puddle, and they're heavy, and uncomfortable, but for exercise they are perfect.

My legs finna be strong like King Kong when I get back from this.

May 7, 2022

You can type in daily words that aren't exactly a hundred words here, you know?

I've been wondering if it's a good thing or not. I have a tendency to cheat systems when they can be cheated. If it's comfortable to do so.

On the one hand it is nice you get a bit more leeway regarding your written daily quota, but on the other the fact that you're not forced to write exactly a hundred words kinda makes me less conscious about doing so...

It's nice when you just hit that amount automatically, but if you have to revise..?

Hmm.

May 8, 2022

Been up North for a few days, visiting a buddy, traversing the forests to the point my legs are chafed and red. Three points on each leg. All sides but the back.

I tore up a toe on a sheet of ice too, and for a day or so I was sore. Muscles were overworked. I thought I might actually get some issue with my left shoulder before a hot sauna that seems to have cleared that away entirely.

But what a great trip! This is how you live. Out in the wild. Moving around.

Tiring yourself out for real.

May 9, 2022

Had to get up real early today. I mean REAL early. I mean unconceivably early, really. Wait before you start thinking I actually got up earlier than I actually did: 3:25 AM.

That is early isn't it? Earlier than you were expecting? What time were you thinking of?

Me and good buddy Andreas got up at the same time, and he drove me to a taxi/airport transfer. Got there around 4 AM. Was at the airport at 5 AM. The flight left closer to 7 AM. Was in Stockholm at 8 AM. Home at 10. Work then.

Been a tiresome day...

May 10, 2022

Woke up with a headache today that I really didn't think I'd be able to get rid of, but what you know, I have!

Am I learning the secrets or what? What's going on?

I started by simply stretching, as I usually do. Just a little. Not so much I'd tense up or exert myself. Not so much my head would pulsate additionally.

Then a cold shower, extra cold.

Then a cup of coffee and a slow breakfast.

Then I went about the dues of the day! I went shopping, I took a walk, I got back and did things. Reasonably paced.

It's gone.

May 11, 2022

Finally got my summer trips all booked today! And it feels good. Relief. Calm. Peace and all, though... some of them are kinda early.

I've booked three departures with RyanAir, and their plane leaves at 6:20 AM, which means I need to be up before 4, and the problem I haven't fully solved then is how to get to the bus station.

It's not close. It's about 14 kilometers.

That's just 14 minutes by car, but I can't leave my car there, and cabs are expensive. I've been thinking about taking my bike, but do I really want to before 4 in the morning...

May 12, 2022

I just hope I don't catch a cold.

Been waking up with a lot of phlegm in my throat the last few days. I spit it out. I take a cold shower and spit out more. I feel alright, but just a liiittle tired...

Just pooped after the last trip? When I had to get up around 3 AM in the morning? It might be that. Might be I picked up something on the plane. Or the airport. Which was packed. Might be it's something different entirely...

I don't know. Just hope it goes away now. I need to move.

May 13, 2022

New day, new me, new stress, do feel!

I want to go to concerts. They're starting. There was a good one yesterday but I skipped it, and there are a couple today that I'd like to get to, but I'm not sure I will. The time man. I'm running out of it. And things are weighing on my mind. I need to get some music done; record some stuff; pack and prepare some stuff and do things...

it's crazy how during the winter you feel like you actually have your hands full and the spring comes and you realize you didn't at all.

Now. Damn.

May 14, 2022

Time time time, running away, away, every day, even today...

I got up late again too. Don't know if it's because it's so warm in the room that I sleep as late as I do, but I just can't seem to wake up rested lately. Maybe my body's still fighting something. Maybe there's something going on.

I took a quick jog during our lunch walk today though, and grounded myself a bit, got some sun, have cut my hair, am typing away by the computer but not really accomplishing things yet...

Need a plan. Goals. Deadlines. Discipline won't work without.

May 15, 2022

I gotta wash a rug. Ugh. I'll get to that now.

My sister's probably coming over a bit, and we have things to do today. I want to get to packing too. I want to be prepared early for the trip I'm about to take later this week, so I can calm down a bit. All to many things seem to be amounting, and I just haven't found my peace yet. I'm not getting the rest I'd hoped for this weekend, but maybe I'll get it next week. When I'm off. When it's vacation time again.

Anyway I got stuff to do...

May 16, 2022

Long day at work today. Stressful day. With a studio session and a quick salad shortly thereafter.

I took a Q10 tablet cause I was getting a bit tired, and maybe it's working wonders. Took some B12 too. Have to take care of my body before the trip. The big one to Östersund first and foremost, and then the even bigger one the next week after.

So much to do these days. I didn't have time to write on time but I'm here now, and catching up a day. I need to better plan my catch-up sessions too, time flies...

May 17, 2022

Woke up with a shitload of phlegm in my throat today!!! Warning. Warning. Psychological detriment. Dad apparently has a cold - will I catch it too? Just two days prior to my early morning trip to Östersund? if I manage to stay healthy till then I won't catch it during the potentially all the more immunocompromised train ride, will I?!

It felt like I'd make it scotch free (or is it scott free...?) so why my dad have to catch a cold right now... not ideal. Why isn't he taking better care of himself. Oh man...

Well. Hopefully all goes alright.

May 18, 2022

I'm up early today!

My big bro came over yesterday afternoon and stayed for the night. We had a great time. Ate good food, chatted, took a walk, jammed a bit with out-of-tune instruments...

He's left now, and tomorrow morning I'm heading to the train to take a weekend trip up to visit him.

Wasn't meant that these two events collide, but such is the way things go, everything all at once when it happens.

I'm kinda tired though. Usually I start work in just about three hours. Thinking it might be wise to sleep a bit further before I get up for real...

May 19, 2022

In Östersund. At the HUB3 office - a collective for creative individuals with a coffee machine that my nephew manages.

He had some work to do here so I followed suit, and am currently trying out my brand new spanking laptop (is that how you say it? Probably not) whilst he pursues career opportunities; currently is away assumably pitching a creative movie idea in a nearby meeting room.

It's a pretty cool office, and the coffee's good, and there aren't many people here either since it's currently incredibly sunny out and hopefully we'll be too, soon...

But I am enjoying myself. Trip so far: success.

May 20, 2022

Sitting by computers all day but not in overalls.

Overall: I feel I found my cover phase. Over all. Living in denial though it's a covert fall. No withdrawal. Don't see too far forward if you go for you might not see to morrow.

Sitting on a chair here. Sitting or I stand up. Stand up when I cheer hair. Living with a bland rush. Sulking not in silk, but smitten by the Patton. War is on my mind now and I think I found some action.

Relax son. Go out of your way to get to the golden days.

May 21, 2022

Took a trip to a ravine today, and a cave. Hoverberget. A deep rift in the mountain with an accompanying little hole we could climb into, where they had a Yoga session going. Drums. Theatric lightning (that was a part of the regular exhibit though - non-Yoga-related). People packed tight in sleeping bags along the floor, in stony and cold crevices here and there...

It was cold, but very nice.

We went in again later on, when the sun was starting to sink, and the theatrics were gone. Flashlights only. Felt adventurous. But not eerie. Not unwelcoming.

Just calm and cool.

May 22, 2022

On the train back to Stockholm today and everybody's coughing.

A little kid has a sore throat in the back of the train, and is crying out about it occasionally. Behind me a couple with serious sniffle get onboard about halfway through the trip. I ate lunch with my nephew at a restaurant where this old dude walked in coughing all over the place.

We swapped tables.

He got some food and walked around the salad buffet coughing frivolously. Then sat down a while. Then fetched a cup of coffee and coughed a bit on the cakes.

And you wonder why people are sick...

May 23, 2022

Back in Bro baby!

Gotta say it like that so it sounds like I actually love it. Like I'm pumped to be here. I'm not entirely, but it's not so bad is it? I've fetched some packages, I'm doing the work, I gotta make a phone call... things are aligning in life and it is alright, and I'm heading off on a new trip soon.

It's to the North this time.

Even further North.

To the place I love and cherish and hope won't ever perish: Norrbotten. Home sweet home. Homeliest dome I've ever known, where I've grown and roam.

May 24, 2022

Felt hella tired today, but I still managed to get done what needed to be done.

I've packed. I've tidied up a bit. I've gone through my room, and food items, and other things, and realized there was more I wanted to take with me than I'd manage to, so I left some for my parents.

It feels good to be sorting out things without being in panic mode about it all too. Just going about the daily dues like any other day, only tomorrow's a big one, and I don´t wish to overexert myself/get sick...

Slow and steady wins the race.

May 25, 2022

Last work day of the week, and it turned into a good one!

The dues progressed as dues should do. I manage a good portion. Around five PM my boss left the office too, and I had a couple hours there for myself, which always feels pretty nice.

It's peaceful. I don't think as much about my posture (maybe that's not an entirely good thing though...), or what sounds I make, or if I give an impression of efficiency. I just immerse myself in my work, and time goes, and there's no pressure.

Times like this I wonder if I really am an introvert.

May 26, 2022

The plane was PACKED today.

And in addition to the passenger numbers being greatly greater than the norm, I also sat beside two ladies of... vast proportions.

It's not entirely bad with a little human touch now and then, in a society where we're all the more distanced and unhealthily hygienic, but this was hot. I mean the lady beside me was hot, and I was hot, and crammed together we were even hotter, and it took waaay too long for them to get the AC going!!!

For a while I wondered if I'd panic and just have to get out.

But it went alright.

May 27, 2022

Sitting up North right now. With my computer. Feels kinda strange...

It feels good though too.

I don't like admitting it, but not only am I apparently very reliant on the Internet and my online routines these days, but it's also become a bit like family. It's become a source of comfort and meaning, albeit one that's so much more uncertain than a real herd would be, and I don't like how much I apparently rely on this modern medium to feel at peace and purposeful...

I need to find a source I feel at home with even when offline...

May 28, 2022

The days are a grind, but pay it no mind, I wouldn't want it any different! Don't leave that behind. The sun is a shining outside and I'm smiling but trying to find, a better, posture...

That won't hurt my back! What happened, relax. It pains me a little sometimes, now it's whack. Must be something twisted. Doesn't help that I lift things. Or run with a pack. It's making me crack.

Sometimes barely notice. Sometimes it's barely there. But then it strikes back and reminds me with a flare. All I can do is focus. Do what I dare. And bare, and bare and...

May 29, 2022

I slept until 12:30 AM today!

Initially woke up around 9:30, and was a bit annoyed that it seems I keep waking up at this specific time, even when I'm not fully rested. I felt like I could've slept more. I shut my eyes a bit and... whaddayaknow, I did! Time flies and here we are now!

Drove by some neighbors today. Put up the mailbox. Swapped some broken posts on our fence. Ended the day with a good sauna...

I'm doing a lot of good work up here but my back's kinda killing me.

Think I need a chiropractor when I get back.

May 30, 2022

First day working up North!

It started alright, though I'd forgotten to install Skype on my laptop. Logged into the web-based version real quick while I tried to find the right download. And it seems the plastic cover I put up over my neighbors missing upstairs window isn't staying in place like it should. She'll be here in a couple days. It might rain. Should probably fix that during my lunch break...

But I'm staying disciplined so far; doing the work I'm supposed to be doing. Have some lower back pain. Wonder what to do about that.

But life's definitely better here, work or no.

May 31, 2022

Had some trouble with the last batch here! This one. The final day didn't show for me. The thirtieth showed up twice. I couldn't complete the batch, and I couldn't re-select it, and maybe I shouldn't have done anything about it cause in retrospect it would be kinda cool to have the odd one in, one legit complete one with one day less than the norm but... I figured it might cause problems. So no dice. Let's solve 'em. Go all in.

Site admin's quick to respond here.

All is good. And the month is over. Let us move on.