The hours until midnight are ticking by. I've been watching Don & Don 2, and just took a break from the second one to eat an amazing dinner on smoked salmon trout with home-grown potatoes and lingon-berries in water (first time I taste the latter) together with my family.
The sky is forebodingly dark outside, all is silent, but somewhere out there I'm sure preparations in honor of the forthcoming year are beginning to stir. A sudden spark of light gives a sneak peak at what's soon about to come, and I'm looking forward to it! The flares of luminescent fire! The explosive grandeur and prowess, and the mist of smoke that drifts over the rooftops, until the commotion dies down all that reminds of the past year is a sour smell of gunpowder. The first morning after this day is always like the day after a great battle. You are at peace with yourself; the world is calm. Without the fireworks, I wonder if the slate would feel as fresh as it does?
Before this, there's so much that remains to be done that I've been optimistic enough to think I'd actually have time to finish before the New Year, that I now realize I don't. A set of resolutions? That's one thing I shouldn't wait with. After a quick review of the oaths I took last time... what should I plan for? What are my visions? What do I really want to achieve? I wish I had a few days to contemplate my innermost desires and the choices I want to take in life, but will have to make do with the time I've been given. Maybe that could be a plan for next year, to start writing my resolutions in time? But then, that would mean that I am assuming the resolutions of this year won't leave me with such an immense sense of satisfaction and purpose that I need to perform this ritual again. Not very promising! :D
I liked my old 'I Want To Do', 'I Want To Be' type lists, but it strikes me as I'm writing that there's a big psychological flaw in that approach. Never say want if you are going to do something! But what about never say never? Aaanyway, in 2014, I...
- Project 2014 Every day of the year I'm going to write something creative, like a poem, a rhyme or a short story. I'll be posting them online too (though maybe not always on the day in question), right here.
- One Album I'm going to record, produce and somehow distribute at least one original full-length album of my own.
- One Book I'm going to write or finish writing a complete literary work, and seek to get it published. Bonus goal: Actually get it published.
- Work I'm going to apply for at least ten jobs every week, unless I get a full-time occupation or earn at least 10k SEK/month (after taxes).
- Strong! Unless I am absolutely unable to do so, I will walk a minimum of 3km each day, stretch each day and exercise in some other way twice a week. Bonus goal: martial arts!
- Self-Sufficient! Absolute financial stability is more of a must than a want at this point.
- Dentally Trouble-free! I will brush my teeth twice a day. Bonus goal: fight phobia and visit a dentist again.
- Happy! I will strive towards attaining a mindset that lets me wake up early every day, with a smile, full of hope and vigor. I will appreciate life. I will savor the taste of good food, the wamrth of the sun, fresh air; all others sensations to their fullest. Bonus goal: never stall.
So that's it. That's my plan for the new year. Is it too much? Is it too little? Is it all irrelevant? Am I putting an unnecessary burden on my shoulders just by making this list, or will it actually help me become a better person? I hope it's the latter.
As a wise man once told me, it's through doing what you are uncomfortable with doing that you evolve and mature as a human being... and I'm definitely uncomfortable with a couple of the points on this list. For once, I will achieve them all. I'm somewhat uncomfortable by the thought of that too, not by the thought of success, but maybe... the possibility of failure? It's why we procrastinate, if we do, but that's one bad habit I'm going to break completel. Now back to watch the rest of Don 2, and in a while... a salute for the New Year!