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Inktober #29 - Keep Going

Aw yeah, it's the final stretch! And life's still a mess but... let's get it!

I'm stepping! Life's both depressing and hectic
Visiting a chiropractor to straighten me out
But it won't straighten out my mind, won't erase my doubt
Won't give me purpose, won't get me about, I need some...

More clout! I need confidence
I'm entering a phase of life where I care less
Where I'm fearless, where I'm more intent
But still hesitate with every step, and get careless

It's not a good combination, it's a bit
I want to rock but with each one I trip (and roll)
I gotta lot of old demons haunting me still
But I live for the life and the thrill, so what

If you haunt me! I flaunt my demons
I wear them on my sleeve, sleep on 'em when I sleep
I know they won't ever leave, they're a part of me
So I draw from their energy and start to be

Creative! And greater than I've ever been!
Embrace the art but don't let it win!
Enjoy the dark but don't let it in!
It's a start, till I get back in my head again...

Vent a little when you feel tethered
Keep it together like a house of cards
Live large but don't park in a dark garage
And sink into the grit and the concrete

Get a grip! Like the Swedish man Cim!
Who grips a hundred K like he's lifting pins
I don't want to be that size, I really want to slim
But I want his motivation! I want to win!

James Heart my inspiration teacher!
Give me good beats sir! I'll speak to 'em discreet:
Get the fuck out of your seat, stand up on your feet
And live your life!
Don't you mind me...

I slowly come to terms with reality
I appreciate a plant or a chair on a balcony
Used to be a lone wolf now care about family
And after lunch now clean the kitchen pedantically

I manage to seem like I manage
Put on clean clothes, go to work, get savage
Never go to bars, never drugged, never hammered
Up early by the PC with a coffee and banana

And every October like clockwork:
Get back to this challenge and jot a lot of words
I love collabing with the NG fam, you my band
Hope we never disband, though it's a lot of work

I go berserk some days, tired from work some days
Never sleep enough but it's OK my liege
Till Halloween when my metaphorical demons scream
Through the screen... can I keep the leash?

Hell YES! I'll keep going till I'm out of breath.
Never doubt, never cloud, just sound intense.
And stress less when I'm in this routine
Someday I'll make something big of myself, I still dream

Competition though is so saturated
If everyone makes tracks and their track's the greatest
Everyone's so good at what they say and do
Who am I to jump in with a wave or two

Till the amounts amount and you lose count
And the little water droplets are an ocean
Speak your shit and drip drip till you're BIG big
And your flow's intercoastal

I'm not good at puns, I'm not good at boasts
But I have my fun, and if I hook I hope
I'm a catch something and I don't mean flu
Just a bas or trout: or a good review

Keep going even if you reach no one!
I reach a few people, some peeps still zone in
I'm homely but travel a bit away from the homeland
Just to see the world before my casket's closing

Why do I go back to the morbid prosing?
I'm like a Norbit in orbit; the world's not roses
It's like Thandie Newton, crushing me like a few tons
But somewhere in her there's love too, and a huge one

Wave your wand dude and go shoot some Super 8
Sit in your Supra and chew some grapes
If you don't have a Supra maybe make a new deepfake
It's the future! The new school is great

It teaches you how to cheat and lie but also
Feed a prompt if you can't feed Malawi
I'll be damned if AI is the future I need
NGL though I'm tempted to let it write some rhymes for me...

So I can close my eyelids... but no! I'm not folding! I'm still that dude! I keep going! Until I'm huge!

I do have a good life and things to lose
It's not all black like a broken neck on a half-pipe
And every Inktober when I step in I get mad vibes
I'm building up slowly! Just like a stalagmite

Overtime I'll make the dopest rhymes!
I will hone my craft until I tow the line!
Until I break the mold, either that or till I'm aged and old!
And totally forget vocal control, but I hope!

It won't ever come to that I want to power through this draft
And keep crashing the party here until I'm eighty!
With JamesHeart's music in back of this trail blazing!
Mixtapes later! For now it's new playlists!

Face reality and don't let it fade!
It's what you make it! It's marmalade!
It's sugary and unhealthy but tasty too!
Do what you want to make with it if you know what's best for you!

KEEP GOING!
LIKE YOU GOT SOMETHING TO PROVE!
OR SOMETHING TO GROOVE TO!
THIS BEAT IS YOU!

Inktober #29 - Keep Going (3:55)


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Inktober #28 - Standing Desk

AKA Can I Stand The Desk, Can I Stand This Desk...

Spent this day by a standing desk
Pondered sitting down, but I'll have my rest
When I have worms crawling in my head - I'm saying when I'm dead!
When I've taken my final breath

Till then? Total mayhem
May 'hem' be where I feel at home
Cause that IS literally home in Sweden
And right now it does feel a little bit cold *gotta turn the heater up*

Autumn's coming for real! It holds
A special place in my lungs... inflammation!
Like what I think of this stinkin' nation!
And the world overall, under our burly control

We're not subservient at all
We need a savant to be birthed and wake us
Give us a slumbering potential reincarnation
Immortalize our life cause we'll surely die

And from yours truly: I fear more and more
That I'll pour all the more time into routine and chore
And the less time I have at my disposal when I'm older -
The longer time that will take and I lose control over

All the wonderful things out in the world
Things I want to know, places I want to go
Faces I want to probe with lips - with consent that is
A bliss I want to continually hit - for but a little bit!

Why do we butt heads with stuff?
I know I've potential: I could learn to drive a truck or a bus
I could train for the train, make a living an unconventional and adventurous way
Time is my only real currency, and that wanes

Even without surplus work and a fat check!
Balance of life and work? Haven't found that yet
And I'm not the first, but I find it strange
We say 'work' and 'life' as if they're not the same *shout out Maté*

How do you challenge the balance?
How do you stand your ground, and still best manage the planet?
While managing yourself, and your limited span
Of time to do what you truly want to while you can

The more I do for myself and level up 'fun'
The less of that you get for everyone

I want unlimited time, but do I dare invest
My lifetime on discovery you might rarely get
Where do I gamble my hours, what mantle is in my power
It's easier to just stay sour and say you dared not step

Sit comfortably in your chair and just stare
At whomever is actually out there doing something real
But like I said I'm a stander I'm not a sitter!
Discomfort and bitterness. My standards for a liver.

Can I stand this DESK? I keep asking myself.
Maybe best... give it a rest.

Inktober #28 - Standing Desk (2:18)

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Inktober #27 - Halloween's Coming...

Cyberdevil... Aalasteir... yeah!

0:10

Halloween's coming up quick! I'm sitting with my back newly chiropracted
Summer may be done, bundled up, bashed in... autumn's not all bad though it's thrashin'
Never been much for party crashing, not half as hardy as when I was a kid
Never been a party animal, didn't screw around, didn't start to hammer, that's grim

But I do like the season! Trees without leaves and it's freezing, they're going Wim Hof without reason
But it's literally cool! All these trees in the nude! Peeping the view!
I do mention Wim Hof a lot but you've got to, he's huge
And a bright light in the world, if the world's cold and cruel...

I'm just saying man nae cap, if you never tried a real man's ice bath
You'd better defrost your freezer, seal seams, then fill it up and try that
I don't even bat an eyelash if I see peeps jumping in in the winter
Cold water's food for the soul and ozone and your bones grow strong and you thinner - so go on like a winner

I still walk around in shorts when it snows, I'll never grow up never grow out of those
And never abort my Inktober prose, even if days are both sullen and slow
And I'll never not take my lunch walk, even when it's hella blowing and cold
Cause I want to live a good life, and I want to stay on the road till I'm old like the Pope

This Halloween thing... it's coming soon
I'll probably be celebrating... in my room
Sitting by the PC again... spilling out some tunes
That's what I've chosen! So that's what I'll do...

Still light-headed like a LED light, staying up late night on a red night
Sitting by the PC stuck like a bread bite, gluten sure fucks up your head high
You really are what you eat so tread light, keep a red thread right in your garden
Follow it back home to the led pipes, you are what you eat: keep farming

I don't want to harm myself... though there may have been a time when I did
Oblivious little kid... sick of living in this world, where I feel I didn't fit
Always liked to play hide and seek, and I most liked the part where I hid
I was proud if they never found me! And I just stayed hid, stayed still

Just want to chill man! But also be a pilgrim!
Explore a world nobody's ever seen! Not sit in this building!
I damn the people who made the land what they think makes it grand:
Just full of concrete slabs! If I see you honkie: WHAM

But royalty free beats are an elite feat, so I've made this
All peeps who make great things for free, I appreciate it
And if you're thinking of dressing up for a party: forget it
Just be yourself. Find your inner pirate vampire or heretic.

Halloween's coming...

Inktober #27 - Halloween's Coming... (2:15)

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