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Avalanche Sharks (2013)

Avalanche Sharks (2013)

Avalanche Sharks [AKA Snow Sharks] tells the story of a bikini contest that turns into a horrifying affair when it is hit by a shark avalanche.

So I watched another Syfy shark movie. Sue me. How many do they have though? It's crazy, but groovy. But maybe if they spent some more time on these flicks, the special effects would be finer and shit. And I wouldn't grow idle and quit. It's spring break though so you do get some idols and tits.

The plot... well there isn't much of it. The main dilemma: keeping a tourist resort open during tourist season no matter what, ghost sharks or no, seems highly familiar. It's pretty much the same as Sand Sharks (and Ghost Shark before it), but now they're trying to take it seriously. It's not working.

They do have one thing going for them, and that's the girls, and the ghost shark effects are cool, but the rest? Oh man. You think they'd at least be able to make a wooden pole fall naturally.

If there's one thing all of these movies lack it's the special effect quality necessary to let the viewer at least somewhat immerse themselves, but it's not just that with this one. The script's old and messy - the description doesn't even match, and the characters all seem to be fighting each other rather than the sharks.

In conclusion this is not one of the better segments of the Syfy Shark Movie Suite. Just like Ice Sharks. The girls may be better-looking, but they really seem to have a problem working with this particular element. It's cool, but pretty far from the ocean after all.

 rated 1/5: shit shit shit


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