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The Human Centipede 3 (2015)

The Human Centipede 3 (2015)

A third Human Centipede? How far can they can really take this!

The German (it's Dieter Laser again) plays a mad prison warden in this one, intent on devising new torture devices and thus methods of criminal correction. Low on financing, at the risk of getting fired, both desperate but also overwhelmingly insane, when one day a movie director with a poop fetish comes with a 100% medically accurate solution: they jump on it.

It shocks, again. Especially the ball scene. But who can take this seriously, really? The characters are portrayed with a comical form of insanity, and though the violence is always prevalent, the blood flows, and you never know what twisted impulses the warden gets next... it's hard to take this one seriously. No doubt that's the motive, too. It's different from the predecessors, even with the re-occurring them, and that said I guess they all are. Each one, though the first and two were somewhat related, present the Human Centipede in a very different way.

This time it's with a very misleading cover image, but I chose this over the other since that one's a major spoiler (and this one does look better). Compared to the previous there aren't many female participants here, just the one - as a 'gender experiment', and that's kinda disappointing isn't it.

It's almost like they tried to make this one a comedy, but... it doesn't really work, does it? A mixture of morbid and gruesome and: veiled and considerate. Gruesome and fun? It just doesn't work! They did get in a set of notable actors with this one though, such as Bree Olson, Eric Roberts, Tommy 'Tiny' Lister and that one guy covered in tattoos. Wasn't expecting to recognize so many faces.

Akihiro Kitamura from the first movie makes a short appearance as well, Laurence R. Harvey from the second is back in a prominent but less of a leading role, and even Tom Six (the director) makes a small appearance as a director in the movie: the one who gives the warden this mad idea.

It's an interesting mix. It's an entertaining - and shocking - plot progression. The quality definitely jumped a step since the former, the actors aren't bad, and the gore looks authentic as ever. Dieter Laser once again goes beyond expectations into his role, though I miss his more 'contained' insanity, as it was with the first. What's to complain about though? Once more it's a captivating film, taking the idea to new places with each segment of the franchise, but when this is over: we'd better leave it at that.

 rated 3/5: not bad

The Human Centipede 2 (2011)

The Human Centipede 2 (2011)

I didn't know the Human Centipede was more than one movie, but now that I know I guess I'll have to watch this as well.

This time it's in black and white, the centipede expands a few people in length, and the main character is - instead of a professional doctor - a disturbed loner who, inspired by the former, seeks to realize this macabre fantasy once again. How much further can this really go?

It's brutal, violent and disturbing. There's more nudity. More mutilation. More death. There's more of everything, except maybe color, professionalism, and scenery (most of it takes place in a very gray-looking warehouse), and dialog.

There are also characters whose appearances almost border on comedy, with the very unhelpful psychologist, and the main character's overly aggressive and pain-receptive mother. In a way they remind of horror movies of old, where the acting wasn't as serious, but at the same time they break the scenario. Laurence R. Harvey shines in his main role though, or rather: revolts, and his victims as well.

Once again it's a twisted, sad, and very meaningless story, with a much darker tone than the former. And it's not just the black and white. As far as exploitation goes this is definitely light years ahead of the former, and yet it feels all the more meaningless as a result. Once again it's a movie you can't stop watching, suckered in by shock content, uncomfortable as it often is, and in the end I'm not sure what to rate it... maybe I should do as that one renowned critic did with the first, and give it no rating at all, saying that it stands in a world of it's own (paraphrased). Grotesque, yet captivating, and appreciatively away from conventional limitations,

 rated 3/5: not bad

The Human Centipede (2009)

The Human Centipede (2009)

No doubt you've at least heard of this one? The incredibly disturbing. The highly unethical. The one within which many of the prospects walked out of the audition room in the disgust. The 100% medicinally accurate (so they say because the director, Tom Six, conferred with a surgeon about the premise of the movie).

It starts somewhat typical: a couple of girls are out driving, in the woods, in Germany, and their car breaks down. They end up in a German's house, and though he seems kind of strange, both arrogant and introverted, he still seems alright... until he sedates them, catches them when they try to escape, and make them (and a Japanese guy) a part of his macabre experiment: sowing them together, mouth to anus, to create an obedient and self-feeding pet.

The doctor doesn't like humans, has bizarre paintings on his walls (the one of the twins painted by the director no less), a clean house, and goes about the experiment with a sense of professionalism that - morbid as the movie is - does impress.

The filming's great. The actors too. The doctor (played by Dieter Laser) in particular gives a scary impression. Because he's out of his mind, or because he isn't? It's an uncomfortable, and unconventional horror movie of the sort, with such an uncomfortable scenario presented in - at least when it begins - such a clean and clinical way. Not one you enjoy watching but... it's hard to stop. Shock? A lot.

Though it's well-made it does lack some form of decisiveness, and takes the exploitation factor to an almost unappreciatably clean level, and I think that's where the score falters. At the end you wonder what you really watched this for. Why? I'm almost ashamed; instantly reminded of: /movie-madness-2016.html

Can't undervalue the production value though, low budget as it is. Props on really going where nobody dared go before: Tom Six.

 rated 3/5: not bad

Movie Madness (2016)

Movie Madness (2016)

This all amounts to nothing.

Yupp, that's about it. It's a movie without mission. A movie without point. For a long time that's how it felt, and I was wondering if that one guy wouldn't get interviewed at the hospital, everything fall in place and the happy ending come running... but then it took an unexpected turn.

Now that it's made clear what it's all about I realize they did it well. But would I have watched it if I knew? And would the message have come across if I didn't? Victims of a myriad of different school shootings all coming together in this one, meaningful, macabre dash of random violence... that was unexpected. That made you think.

Everything leading up to that however: not so good. Not the acting nor the special effects. Not the pace. Not the script. Considering the actors were all grouped up in such a special way I should give props though. They managed something special, but at the same time, no, this isn't what I want to see. And that intent seems to shine through in production too.

I appreciate the idea, but there's little redeeming value outside of that.

The plot's that of a movie bootlegger stumbling into a theater of murder and madness after it's taken over by a demonic hit man.

Big Daddy Kane the only name I recognize in the cast, and it's a bit spooky how the killer is never revealed. Who was he, really? Interesting watch.

 rated 2/5: decent

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