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Bigger Blogs

Over at NG, there are currently just over two hundred thousand blog posts. Probably more than half of these would in normal cases not be considered blog posts. They consist of only videos or pictures. Or one-line phrases, statements, quotes and elemental de-propaganda. Or other things. Out of all blogposts not many more than half exist anymore, the other half have been deleted, the deleted half consisting of more intimate blog-posts, mentions of real life, questions, answers, honest ramblings. Or illegal content, rightfully deleted by the administrators. I don't understand people who delete blogs. I keep all my blogs, even the blogs I later look back at and wonder why I wrote them at all. The blog-posts consisting of one-line phrases, the blog-posts I wrote just to write, the news I no longer find relevant, opinions in the past that don't match the current once I conceal, cte (put that back-words, just for the strangeness in it).

Outside newgrounds the blog population is dominated by WordPress, looking at the total download numbers reaching far beyond the million and the number of host that offer pre-installed WordPress software to all server customers, it seems that at least half of the WORLD uses this system. The other half is dominated by free communities such as Freewebs, Geocities and Blogger, who offer blog scripts of their own. Here, on this site, you might notice that a small "Written in WordPress" line phases the bottom of the screen. That's right, despite my seniority I'm part of the vast majority, but I don't mind, I'm a different one of my kind. The one who reinvents the wheel only to buy a brand new SUV. Huzzah!

Good Times

Hehe, been going through old folders, sorting files. Once in a while I find a screenshot like this one here, this one taken at I hold all records of posts per day, reviews per day, blogs per day, comments per day & submissions per day over there. Though time now doesn't allow me to be even a hundredth as active as I would have liked to. Shame.

Good Times

Harrassed By Minor Masses

I have a small group of vicious foes that loyally stalk me since the account hacking over at NG. They contribute with vicious comments on my few blog posts over there and commonly send me quite entertaining randomly generated insults my PM, as well as claiming rights on the hackin. Without evidence though, it doesn't matter much who hacked my account, what's done is done and I won't be forgetting the past, but it's nothing I should spend my future contemplating about. As for their commentaries, as they say, ignoring is bliss, the most beneficial psychological strategy possible. What baffles me is that they first now, after hacking my account and spending hours deleting all my content, feel like posting abusive comments on my blog. They didn't do so before, even though they do claim to have hated me for a long time, so is their imaginative victory going above their heads? Do they feel like they need more credit? Are they sour since I'm not flaming them at all, instead moving on with other newer projects? Or are they taking credit for the hacking as a reason to make me mad at them, not being involved at all? No matter the reason, I don't let their words catch on, it's just something I was pondering about this morning.

Hacking my account due to content overload still has me confused as well. NG has pretty fresh servers so I am amazed it bothered anyone, especially with the restrictions of multiple content submissions per day that they do have. I uploaded all my music and flash to my own website yesterday. The music section, consisting of 740 loops/tracks didn't take up more than 320MB, and the roughly 250 flashes didn't use up more than 2GB, preview images included. Latter 198 pieces of music not included, they were recited poetical pieces and I'll be uploading them to this blog sometime within a nearby future, My hacker gave me a pretty long comment over his reasonings on the hacking through my blog, claiming it was my 'faggotish style of submission and discussion'. I never insult anyone on public communities I like, since it would lower my image massively (and get me banned, duh, it used to get my reviews deleted too, so I stopped using foul language... and started with psychological pressure and ironic comebacks instead), but to some people insults and offensivity is a matter of machoness. Or they just need to grow up a bit. Or they don't appreciate true art. Or, better theory, they appreciate it so much they just couldn't stand being outclassed by an outcast such as me. :L

Anyhow, lack of communicational activity online has me spending more time in real life... or at the moment with my 'real websites' and studies I hope to catch up with before this month is over. I have two days left. I'd like to get all my sites fixed, and running quicker without bugs/typos/missing features as well, updates I have been falling behind in lately.

Aftermath Of The Hacking

So I have my account back now, the one on NG, and the one on Facebook. Facebook authority still hasn't authorized my name change though, back from Bam Bammington to Bob Axell. Wade, on NG, gave me a little reminder to quit spamming the site or he would be sure to delete me himself. Unappreciative bastards. Dedicative stat-whoring, regardless of cause or effect, is a benevolent action towards the community. I had already learned my lesson on the spam-front too, I was careful to never submit spam nowadays, my blogs I always write standom right. Actually I had just stopped blogging on NG, so I'd have time to focus on this blog instead. I had stopped submitting quickly created flashes about two months back as well, and the musical pieces I was in the midst of submitting a pair of each day were all pieces of recited poetry, all of meaning and mind to me. Not that it takes me much effort to scribble down the swift chimes that popup when they do, but altogether it takes much time, and the inspiration contained within them is nothing that will be running back to me again anymore.

Been trying to calm down, get a grip, think of better things, for the past few days, but it's still hard grasping the whole situation. It's not how I wanted it to become. The tracks and flashes that were not deleted, a pair of dustbins, are not the best of my creations. They are in fact pretty half-assed. but I'm still happy that my cracking hacker couldn't get rid of them, they go back a few years, and leave me with a speck of history. I wrote down a time-line of my life on NG thus far, as the first blog after the past two thousand that passed away. It went like this:

2003 - I first find NG, and sign up to the wonderful community it is. Due to a server crash at the start of 2004 my account, and a few hundred other new accounts, are wiped out. Two drives failed simultaneously, and thus all damage done could not be restored. Already a few music submissions blew away, reviews, flashes, and a shitload of forum posts.

2004 - No downfalls this year, everything went yay ok, I broke barriers in the reviewing records, didn't post much at the forums, and climbed up slowly in all rankings. I was in school at this time, and thus had much free time on my hands, most of which I started spending here at NG.

2005 - I created my new account, and started writing reviews like there was no tomorrow. Posted at the forums too at a terrifying rate, hundreds of posts per day. Me and some other user I used to have in my buddy list (that I now thanks to the hacking no longer know the name of, something along the lines of lxllxllxl) spammed the P-Bot postings in a ravishing rate. Boom, long term ban, and over a thousand posts deleted. I had been banned plenty of times prior to it, but didn't care much about it before disaster struck. Thus I lost interest in this place for a while.

2006 - This year was Retrogade year, another community similar to NG but with a smaller user database and drawn art instead of animations. I had been signed up earlier and stat-whoring there as well, but during 2006 I spent almost all my community time here, and didn't bother much about NG, climbed up to the top of most rankings. Almost everyone there was a stat-whore, I fit right in, and I went right past most of them.

2007 - Poof, Retrogade went plummeting down into a pile of ashes. Thousands of reviews disappeared, hundreds of art submissions, over ten thousand guestbook entries and I don't even remember all the forum posts, blam points, exp, ratings, views, awards and other stats they tracked. I returned to NG, and made a little statual comeback here. The blogs were invented, and I liked writing, so I started writing. Oh, and I graduated! Woohoo! Less time on my hands, or so I thought. :P

2008 - Way back I had submitted a Linkin Park music player, it reached a hundred pages of reviews, which I undeniable appreciated, and thus I went into a Music Player spree. I made Music Players for both audio portal artists and other artists, and I was reaching the end of the series (99 of them) when they just disappeared. Tom sent me a PM saying there was just to much copyright music on NG. I let him know that about half of them were made with music from the AP and not infringing upon copyright at all. Bummer, he said, a system for restoring deleted content was not yet in place though, so there was nothing he could do about it. That kicked me down a bit, but I stayed active. I blogged hellishly, had a hundred times more blogs than the user after me, arranged two series of Guessing Games, contests in which users had to answer questions, often with a picture as the main motive. They gained popularity, it was fun, groovy times, I wrote a weekly summary of my life and lots of other poetical mumbojumble. Submitted lots of flash, lots of music, posted a lot at the forums, did much of everything. Rose to #1 in the audio reviewers list and climbed up a couple of places in the flash reviewers as well. This was probably my most active year thus far.

2009 - Instead of weekly blogs I decided to have monthly projects this year, so I started January by sending in two flash JukeBoxes each day (with music from the AP only). In difference to my previous Music Players I didn't spend much time on these, I just wanted to finally get a series with 99 pieces done and have them forever stay in the portal. January passed fine, I submitted 62 of them, received a few requests as well and much praise, but I should probably have slowed down because people started to get annoyed and eventually thanks to a comment by Wade (am starting to like him less and less for every year that passes since I signed up here) they were suddenly bombed by zeros and dropped from all having over 3s in score down to the 1s and below. Wade threatened to delete them if I didn't slow it down a bit, so I did, stopped at 77 for a while, and worked on a few new decent flashes. I recorded poetical sessions this year as well, spent a lot of time writing down and reciting my own pieces of poetry, and submitted these to the audio portal. Sometime at the start of April I reached 666 creations, haha, and I posted my last blog, blog 2200something, since I decided I no longer had the time to blog here. Everything was going fine until Bam, account hacked, everything deleted. And there this seven year story ends.

Does it end there? Well of course not, I'll still be there to gather my EXP, some BP maybe, but my motivation really has left me. Maybe I'll start focusing on reality now, maybe not, what sucks majorly is that my database of friends on Facebook disappeared too, all the old buddies I've had yet to reunite with for real. Hackers messing around with peoples personal life like this, without any real cause, is just wrong. But keeping the setting in the past is no motive for me, I'm moving on, already have my driveup for my finally upcoming license scheduled in next month, and I'm catching up in studies. Fuck you Bam.

Lost, Finding A New Way

I've had the same password on 103 tracked sites (and lots more I never bothered to keep my info on) for 11 years now, so it's not a surprise that one of them got hacked eventually. It stings when it does though, specially when it happens to my most important account of all, my account at newgrounds. I didn't think I had any enemies online, but apparently I do. This cracker deleted everything I had contributed with for the past five years, over 2200 blogs, over 700 pieces of songs and loops and a little over 100 pieces of flash, both animations and games, not to mention all the reviews, ratings and favorites that disseminated with them. I've been trying to contact website 'authority' for the past two days but so far not a response. Since I use the same password the cracker managed to steal his way into two of my other accounts online as well, and deleted everything I had worked for there, 666 updates on twitter and the large database of friends and comments I had gathered on Facebook. If you're reading this, you who did all this, I'd like to know why. What could I possibly have done that made you want to ruin such a large part of the online presence I've been building up for half a decade in one day?

I don't feel like changing passwords on all sites I have accounts one, most of them I no longer even visit, so thus I've decided to focus only on a few accounts online, ones that I frequently visit, not snatch any new accounts on sites I don't need accounts on and no longer keep track of accounts I probably won't use... and stay offline as much as possible. Furthermore, I'm dividing up all my used accounts in security classes, and keeping myself logged in to all of my most important accounts, with randomly generated passwords written down only manually for these, not reachable by anyone who doesn't get near me, in person. I added a bit of a boost to my site security as well, it might help. If only a system more secure than passwords could be made, like voice control or fingerprints as a standard for accessing the services online. After this I really feel like it's needed. Heres to the next era of hope, and I just hope they have the possibility to provide individual account backups on my stuff.

Promises Redefined

I've been thinking, and I know  I should have finished thinking before the new year arrived, but it seems things work a bit differently now in year two thousand nine. I am a very self-criticizing individual, always striving to achieve perfection. I know I'm never going to reach perfection, and I am happy about this, because if one reaches perfection then there is nothing more to strive for. Yet I aim for and hope that I'll become a better individual this year, as well as reach the goals I have set out for myself, all goals probably improving me as a person too.

I divided my list of promises into three this time, focusing on the three current main factors of my life. Me, Life and Newgrounds. The lower in the list the lesser the priority, but the easier the task. I won't be going through this list one at a time, but I will look back at this post once in a while and try to stay on the right track, and I think that these are really the things I feel and should strive for most. My educational goals go without saying, I am studying full-time the first semester this year, which is of course my top priority, all else turns to shit if I don't get my tributive money, evidential grades and wisdom gained, but other than my studies, what I want to and will do:


  1. Never hesitate
  2. Write one poem each day of the year
  3. Improve my singing skills and vocal voice
  4. Learn to communicate better with other people
  5. Improve enough physically to participate in Marathon
  6. Finish all projects I start, and focus on tasks at hand


  1. Get tattoo
  2. Get drivers license
  3. Double my savings
  4. Get website costs +/- 0
  5. Publish one book
  6. Start company


  1. Reach 20,000 Forum Posts
  2. Reach 10,000 Flash Reviews
  3. Reach 5,000 Music Reviews
  4. Submit two Flashes each day in a month
  5. Submit two Audios  each day in a month
  6. Participate in six important events
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