Another week passed by fast. I want to write a rhyme get me back on my track(s). Seven eight nines and the count is a lapse. My mount is my casket my crown is my cast. My cast's too small - need a few new workers, so I can go berzerk with all that I want to serve yer cranium, insane idioms - a rain of refrains and a map pack for all those games that I've slain. But no pain no gain and my main pain's timeless, less time more pain, lest I find bliss. A state of mind where I leave all behind and forget about all time and if you look straight into my iris - you'll see that I eye bliss even with wide eyes under my lids. I go the full mileage. Yeah.

So the week started with a cold still brewing. Fortunately I only had one day of 'work' until I'd reached the monthly quota; no need to call in sick (I'm paid hourly so I wouldn't get paid if I stayed home), and the rest of the week's been a breeze... though busy all the same. I've reformed the comment system a bit on this site, added avatars and some nifty CSS styles, and somehow managed to hide the comment form from all posts without existing comments, but... I'll get that fixed. Soon. So you can all start writing again. Both of you. :P

I've paid my time with studies, a walk with a buddy, plenty of NG, 9 posted reviews (of movies I watched last week and the one before that... mostly) and this and this and this and this and that's it. Also finally got around to posting those favorite music videos of 2013. Last week's right there.

I caught a cold on Thursday. Night. Took all potential precautions soon as I started feeling that itch in my throat, but to no avail. Friday I was floored, slept all day and writhed around in fever and chills the night after, headache and jawache and all that shizznit. Come Saturday I was doin better - we had guests over that night but I stayed in my quarantine upstairs, and come Sunday I'm sitting here typing this, about to embark on a venture towards my creative writing deadline tonight. The only problem is... I have no Internet.

Since Friday, I've had no Internet. I tried logging on just to perform my daily routine, but it didn't work, and I had no energy to start troubleshooting. I tried a few times during the day hoping it'd solve itself; nada. Probably good in a way since I needed the rest. Did some troubleshooting the day after, winded out the colossally long cable we've had wound up behind the old computer, tried my other computer, tried a different modem (I have a spare - a clone), checked with an alternative cable between modem and computer... nothing. Today I finally called support, early morning, and apparently we needed a new modem! Previously we've used ADSL, but as we recently (I didn't know about it) had an upgrade from 8 to 30 MBit we need one that supports VDSL. Dad's rolling around town and will hopefully be able to pick one up (it's free), and hopefully I'll get my writing done on time, and hopefully I'll be able to connect and hand it in tonight aaand check back on NG for the first time in a few days.

I know I've typed on the topic before, but it's incredible how reliant we are of the net. I do have a cell for myself so at least I've been able to check email, but apparently certain features are locked. I can't install Flash because it's no longer available through Google Play, and apps that aren't installed through an official source aren't 'allowed'. WTF is that? On Win 7 you can disable the UAC if you want to... I wasn't expecting Android to cage users like this, I want freedom! I want control!! But anyway, the point is: without Flash, I cannot view submissions on NG, which means I cannot vote, which means I cannot deposit EXP, which means logging onto NG via cellphone is useless. Plus the site isn't optimized for mobile so it takes hellllishly long. At least I can check email. And I could check FB... if I wanted... which I'll probably have to do unless I get Internet tonight since I have a 'client' on FB to which I sent a message on Thursday night, just before all of this broke down... and as for studies, with a little extra effort I could've transfered all necessary uploads/downloads from cell to computer to back again, but just... haven't. Stalling with the calling.

Before I was disconnected from the net and the world in general, reading Phantom comics and during the latter day having a considerably harmonious time compared to the feverish torment the night before...

I had something in my eye that kept me awake most of Sunday night, and then I was probably slightly food-poisoned, but as a follow-up on that: I managed to evade the illness. Oregano oil, that's the cure right there. I thought the reason for illment was bad eggs, but apparently it might've been the salad. They just had a radio broadcast on how salad enclosed in plastic packaging combined with eggs can have/gain/whatever staphylococci, so, that was probably it. Revitalized moral of the story: be wary of the salad! Don't know if it's a temporary batch with the bacteria or what...

Work's been fun, and the bike rides back and fourth pretty adventurous. Winter made a quick comeback this week, so I've been cycling in blizzard-like conditions a couple of times too. One day the weather was so intense I almost gave up and walked, the wind howling, sleet, rain and snow combined, hailing down upon me pushing me back as I dangerously strained that bike pedal that fell off last week, taking care at least to lean more on the handles if it'd slip again. The seat's been starting to sink too, so we bought a little clasp-type thing that'll hopefully keep it in place. Crappy bike: agreed.

I played some Dirt 3 earlier in the week, and I must say... I think I liked the older games better. Graphically it's awesome, but in terms of controls it's just... not as fun as it used to be! Not as simple! But back when I played Colin McRae 2.0 for the first time that felt like the most realistic driving experience I'd ever had; it's funny how time changes your perspective. Looking at graphics now I can imagine how games will continually keep improving and we'll always have that woah, they've done it now - it can't get better than this feeling when a new game comes out... I want to play some Oni right now, but I quell that impulse. I'm about to watch a part of a movie and consume my super-healthy breakfast , and then it's time for texting. I mean creative writing. I mean work. At least there's no way to get distracted when the net's cut off, in some strange way it's almost like a feeling of... relief!

Or maybe that's just my nose running like a mofo. Posted a bunch of music earlier this week btw, but the one with music from 2013 never made it for some reason... maybe soon! Also this, and don't forget Larry Griswold!!! And Internet's back btw, but there's no way I'll be able to finish my studies in time, or even stay awake till the deadline, looks like it'll the first one I miss this semester. Tis been a tiring but happy day. ;) Here's last week.

It's been one of those hasty weeks again!

I started a part-time job this week, and cycled to it on Tuesday (that was just the paper-signing event though, on which a pedal fell off the bike on the way back while I was leaning to the side the pedal was on in the middle of a curve) Wednesday (actually I had a lift on that day, hadn't fixed the pedal yet either, just patched up my knee) and Thursday (pedal seems to be holding, but I'm looking to buy a better bike, one with pedals that don't fall off and maybe... gears), and from now on it'll be Monday (on which it snowed hellishly and I almost gave up and walked - in case I forget to mention that later on), Tuesday (today woot) and Thursday (that's the longer day, Mon/Tue are just a few hours) every week.

It's a good job, not bad, not bad at all. Not well-paid but not troublesome or boring either... at least not yet. On Tuesday I was doubtful about it all, as I usually am with stuff like this, on Wednesday I was melancholy and tired cause for some reason I've been waking up a couple of hours before my alarm clock, and on Thursday... I felt great! I've spent way too much time preparing and reading up on things like contracts and taxes, and my employer didn't give me the most detailed specifics on what I'd be doing or how I should be doing it, or what I should do if this or that happens and what I shouldn't do or what people normally take for granted. But it's all good... now. I think I might be getting free lunches too.

With a job on the side I've been feeling much more efficient than I usually feel, doing other tasks at a pace I'm not used to. I thought I'd be procrastinating like usual. What happened? Can it be them bike-rides? The unexpectedly stimulating social interaction I am still new to after mostly being holed up at home freelancing? Or a boost in efficiency because earning money feels like a continual accomplishment (not that I was entirely broke before, but this is an appreciated boost)? Maybe it's just an initial phase of excitement that'll pass, though. I'll keep you posted on thse exciting developments! :P

I spent Friday and Saturday working on the graphics for a game that was supposed to be released yesterday but never made it on time. Not due to me, but due to the programmer bailing out last second (which probably had something to do with me not finishing the gfx until last second), but most of the visual artistry is now done, we're looking around for a new programmer and hoping to have it published before the week ends. And if that fails, it might turn into an entry for this years Stencyl Jam on NG (there be prizes in the pot yo).

On Sunday I played Minigolf with a buddy and then stayed up till midnight working on mah studies.

And thus this weekly summary's been a bit delayed, along with a couple of other things I'll hopefully have the time to fix up soon. I wrote five movie reviews this week, and posted this, and our neighbor Olav died. :( RIP. Overall it's been a fast and eventful week and that's... all I have to say. I realize that if I'd posted this a while back I'd probably have more to say about some of the experiences from these seven days past, but that's the way with time, if you don't document it directly the potential emotion linked to certain experiences fade away into routine and history. About to embark on my fourth 'day' o' work today (did I mention it's part-time? I start at 12). It's all good. And here's something slightly relevant..

Actually I like to work. I want to work. I want to have work I'm so passionate about I'd rather be working than dreaming!! Thus the 'slightly-relevant'. Good music though.

Here's last week.

I've been getting a job. Had an initial meeting this week and will have the official paper-signing event (unless someone suddenly objects... hope not) and interview on Tuesday. Spent Saturday with a buddy, bought an incredibly thick dart board, he bought a golf club (free mini-golf woo), I've watched a few movies, tried getting back into GTA SA a little and finished the week with some hardcore levels of study efficiency.

As for SA, I was pretty much at the end of it when I stopped playing last time, so on a whim I finished that final mission now (on the first try - not for the first time I play out the game - this game's like a profession) aaaand it crashed during the credits. Didn't save. Shit.

As it turns out, running Lod Mod, SRT3 and ENB Series (which all three combined do an awesome job at enhancing the game) bodes for crashes. It's not that my computer can't handle them, I could probably run dual instances of the game on highest settings with no lag, but the game engine has certain restrictions on resource usage that the mods have to circumvent to work properly. They use stuff like Sacky's Frame Limiter or SALA (San Andreas Limit Adjuster) and a couple of other CLEO mods. Problem is, these mods are not perfect, they seem to crash at random intervals, when entering a piza parlor or watching the credits... and I have no idea what to do about it.

I could run the game without mods but I already did that, ten years ago - I want teh modified version now! I want to take it to the next level!! I want more!!! Or maybe, maybe just wait out GTA 5. I hear it's coming out for PC in June but by now I don't trust Rockstar's release dates at all.

I wrote the second chapter of the novel I'm writing yesterday, and the day before that, and I've been polishing the manuscripts during late hours on long nights. I fell after with diary-writing and filled in five days yesterday, I have some game work I should be doing now but I thought I'd get this posted first. I've written some inspired poetry lately, I feel good, I think I'm a little allergic to alfalfa, I was going to title this post Ten Ting but was made aware that means something entirely different than what I thought it did, and that's all for this week.

Oh yeah, we had Fat Tuesday too, also on Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Today and I'm going to post a few leftover reviews after this. have a great Monday!

Here's last week.

I should've posted this on Saturday. We came back from Kangos on Saturday, and at that time I was in the perfect mood for writing a summary of all events passed, I was both inspired and happy and I could recall everything clearly - but I was also pretty tired, so I spent the remainder of that day catching up with anime and then - catching up on sleep, I think I had around 11 hours in that gap between the weekend daze. Sunday was devoted to studies. Yesterday was devoted to stalling. So today, here's a quick flashback into the events of the week passed. Or rather the one big event: the funeral.

On Thursday we flew up North, to Kangos, to attend this event. I'd been pretty nervous at the start of the week but once we were soaring through the air, skies ablaze with life and light, a cup of steaming 'special blend Ceylon designed specifically for flight' (or so they say on the mug they serve in) tea, on the draw-out table in front of me... life felt great. It really is while traveling that I feel most alive, but the time before each flight is a plight of sore stress and a tad bit bad appetite.

After picking up our bags and spending a few minutes trying to understand the super-modern rental car (since when did they stop using keys? since when did they make the hand-brake automatic? since when is reverse on the left-hand side of the gearbox?) we drove to Kangos, stopped by the shop to buy a batch of bottles and with the darkness slowly descending upon us we made our way to the house. Grandma's house.

The upstair-rooms were all booked, so I slept in the living room, in the same bed Grandma had been sleeping in just recently. I thought that might be a bit unsettling, but it was OK, I slept soundly. The clock (it's a large wooden wind-up grandfather clock) stopped just before I went to sleep too, so that made things easier. Usually it chimes once every half hour and as many times as it takes for full hours. I can't imagine how she could sleep with that musical menace nearby, but I guess you get used to anything with time (pun-ch line).

When we arrived only my mother's sister/husband were there, but soon the rest of the relatives arrived. She and mother cooked up batches of food and we took turns sitting down to eat. It's a rather small kitchen, but for the occasion at least twenty of us were huddled up in this space. Took a while to gain appetite, but it was fun meeting everyone again. A few of the crew stayed at the village inn, a few with another relative in the village, and the rest upstairs and in a guest house outside. Night came, we went to sleep, woke up, took showers, forced a minimal breakfast and headed off to church.

I was one of the pallbearers, along with my dad/brother and three others, so we arrived earlier than the rest, carried the casket into a car with a designated set of shiny white gloves, drove to the church and carried the casket inside. The sky was clear blue, the air was cool and the sun was blazing: beautiful weather. Thanks to a lack of morning edibles my stomach started rumbling a bit in church, but at least my nose wasn't running like crazy. Like last time. I had stacked up on handkerchiefs this time around but I didn't need one even once. The priest said a few words, relatives sang songs, we all sat on our benches and either sung or looked at the floor, and when the dirt had finally been strewn on the casket we stood up, carried the coffin back to the car and drove off to the graveyard.

Me and David (my brother) were first in line behind the car on the parade to the grave, where we roped her down and threw red roses in the dirt. And that was it. That was the end of the funeral, we went back to a community hall by the church and ate smörgåstårta, headed back to the house, headed to the town inn for dinner (salmon, potato gratin, salad and rhubarb pie with a cup of tea) and took a walk home at the end of the day.

It was good. The weather was perfect. Nobody slipped up. The food was good. We felt peaceful. At least I did, I can't speak for anyone else, but it felt like... closure. It felt good. It felt like Grandma would've been happy with the occasion, and I hope she was. I hope she was sitting on a cloud looking down at us, pondering our mortal grief. Me and my brother took a morning walk to the cottage (or as close to it as we could get - we followed snowmobile trails atop a meter of powder snow) the next day, we all packed our bags and after a hasty lunch headed back South again, and at the end of Saturday... here I was.

I had time to play plenty of card games with cousin Frasse during our visit too, and introduce him to some new music, and get introduced to some new music myself (note to self - need to check up Hollywood Undead... and those other two artist I forget the names of), spend time with my brother (and all the others, of course) and even take it easy and just... not do anything. It was a good visit. I don't usually write these entries in diary form like this, but this week was special, it marks the end of an era; a start of another one.

I remember something my cousin Mats was speaking about at the funeral: how Grandma was like the gathering place for all of us. It was through her that we met up with each other and kept in touch with all branches of the family. I wonder how things will turn out now; how different everything will be. Someone'll inherit the house. And that someone has a large responsibility. Nobody actually needs the house, but the house is... memories, and it's what groups us together. Even with grandma gone, the house is there, the house that grandpa built. I hope things won't change too much. I hope we can still visit Kangos every summer; stop by the house on our way to the cottage, maybe sit down and have a chat with whomever is there. We could all help out with repairs, keep it like a family hotel... if nobody decides to move there and live there. I hope the family doesn't start fighting over who gets what. I hope nobody decides to take all the old furniture (cause nobody really needs it) or throw out any of the old decor, the paper paintings, the blocky TVs, or change the floor paneling to something modern. I hope it stays as it is forever.

I am a bit nostalgic, yeah... I know!

Well apart from the funeral, the week started with 6 movie reviews and a couple of other posts. I tried being effective on studies before I left but couldn't concentrate and had to get stuff done on Sunday anyway. Also wrote a story for what was planned to be a partially-year-consuming project, but that never really made it. My plans were foiled, for the first time... ever? I think I used that disappointment to my advantage though, fuel for further advancement; food for thought. It'd been a both inspiring and educating week, and tiring, and happy, and sad. Maybe for the last time on this blog: RIP Grandma.

Last week.

Another one of those fast weeks! Feeling tired when I wake like I lack sleep. Inspired by the plays of my last beat. Hoping I don't place last in this fast street - this fast lane - like Max Payne. Well I wrote a few reviews (16 if you're wondering), one a bit different, posted some Strange music, posted something yesterday when I was stuck on a line aaaaand that's about it.

I've been busy with studies and stuff. Added new rating images to the site (previously there was no imagery for such things, just text - woot woot). But that's as far as progress goes as far as the eternal CDB renovation is concerned!

I had a blasting headache on Monday, and since then I've just felt overall tired and weak, but I feed on that weakness and come out strong!! I'd like to say. Guess it's that transition period between winter and spring, when the air's dusty, the sun's waking up but not really warm, the air's damp and cold and yet your jacket's too sweaty, and the windows ajar at night but not too much cause you're still used to cold nights so the room's stuffy when you get up. It's that phase of passing before you start waking up and springing forth to meet the sunshine!

Or maybe it's just a whole lotta tension on my part. Grandma's funeral is nearing; we'll all be flying up to attend at the end of the month. I'm looking around for a dark overcoat, probably going to buy some new shoes later today, and I can barely remember how to tie a tie. I'll be one of the pallbearers too, an honorable task but something I'm a bit nervous about. I mean what if I trip or slip and fall flat on my face; bring the rest of the crew with me? What if my nose refuses to stop running while we all waltz out with our bright white gloves; pressed suit and casket raised high? I don't even want to think about the worst case scenario...

But anyway, that's nearing; though I'm not really looking forward to flying up, or sleeping on the couch or floor in the living room in Grandma's for-the-occasion crowded (but still probably very empty) house, or sitting in church and mingling with strangers and relatives alike... I am looking forward to saying farewell, on getting closure. And though I say this now it will probably be fun to meet up with everyone again; see how everyone's doing. Funerals are just not the funnest occasion for it... funerals are just not fun occasions. RIP Grandma...

Here's last week.