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Inktober #31 - Ghosts

Look man, I've got a lot of ghosts in my head,
Whole book of scary stories that won't close till I'm dead.
And they keep on coming back to haunt me lately,
I relate, Chutney, when you say you're a baby.
I've got so much remorse in store that it's crazy,
Though sticks and stones and all of that shit don't phaze me,
I got an armor that's strong like an ox
But on the inside I'm constantly doxed.
By myself! Check my ego, regrow.
People in the world they bleed but I don't.
I'm cold. Set my heart to stone to be strong,
Yet atone when I wrong, feel so phony and lost,
I was so happy and naive when I was three!
Grew up quick though and now I see!
Society's fucked up and I ain't free!
But is THAT real, is the only evil ME?
That tells me to feel, or not feel, what's not real.
Thank God I got peers - gathered up a lot here,
Haven't cried in years but I've stocked tears!
Coming out the box when my block tears,
Built me up to rock though.

Card soldier but I will not fold.
Go hard. Discard me tardy when it's over.
I don't party I'm sober.
Want to live a fun life though - the hardest rollercoaster.
And I'll learn to be real.
Learn to feel real. Learn to bleed out,
So I get new blood flowing in my cables.
Vented out I'm powderdowning now.
I'll see you later.

Ghosts...

Inktober #30 - Inktober Outro

For today... I HAD written something pretty dope,
But don't you know I woke with some kind of lump in my throat,
Hope it's not a cold, don't worry though I won't fold
This Inktober prose till I Ghost. Just hope it blows over

But Nick, think I gotta postpone our project,
It'll take a few takes but you know I'm on it!
I can't wait to make greatness, and grow bionics
Rap Bot. Though I'm not superstoked on robo euphonics

It's been a great month to be in, European,
But speaking English good enough that ya'll don't know my legion,
I'll repent for sloppy tracks in time and a medium
I feel I've climbed like a tree in. Maybe I'm dreaming.

No better way to kickstart the fall! Really.
Though I'm not all proud of 'em all I'm feeling ready.
To go full pound and assault! Give me a round of applause
And I'll be all like oh my gosh! Silly.

So tomorrow... it'll be the finale!
Either a quick verse or that all in thing, who knows,
If my accursed throat doesn't engross,
But today I'd just like to say: thank y'all folks.

For following. If you did.
I'm kickstarting Patreon next year, throw a dollar in then
I'll be opening the lid for all my following on
All those old things and new I hope to holler in.

And learn a bit and become a scholar in.
Play some games so time goes gallowing
Catch y'all then, for now I'm out! I'm going galloping to handle things and catch a blink.
Tomorrow's Halloween. Yeah.

Inktober #29 - The Corner

I'm chilling on the corner,
Of my office chair, I'm ill as a performer,
Not getting anywhere in my cubicle, you should know,
Sun is shining outside and it's beautiful...

Meanwhile I sit holed up in in my landscape,
Basement, boxed in, no thrill with computers,
I used to be awesome, I needed no tutors,
Self-taught from the bottom and I started with Judo...

But somehow things gave up on me like that bad knee...
Everything most go, so doe the self esteem,
And as the years roll by it doesn't grow either,
Flow's weaker, low sleeper, game changer, need me to...

Breath. Just take in some fresh air!
October is great yeah, Inktober's the step here,
And I need a companion, so slowly I realize,
To keep me motivated in real life, to keep me going...

I'm not the type who doesn't do things, I keep it moving!
If it's productivity as you see it it's ass I see,
I justify what I do, writing daily haikus, stuck on reviewing,
But you bloom as a human when you get in tune with

Other people. We really are sociable creatures.
Used to be the lone wolf and disbeliever, maybe emo,
I turned into a real Keanu Reeves though,
Or his alter ego, Wick yo, you know the sequel?

What I'm saying is I'm tired of playing games all day...
I want to play them all night too! Just blaze away!
And find a place within my mental landscape,
When I've got energy enough to both center, pan, fade!

I'm in all scenes. Seen from all angles.
I both jump, and I hover and I dangle,
Can I be the same peep in the same place and make it seem,
Like I'm a riding a whole row boat parallel race machine!

Like a movie with captions. Or extra endings.
A live life hard once... then try again thing.
I want more action. I'm multitasking.
I'm writing reading and dreaming and maybe rapping at the same time.

That'd hit the grape vine, right?
But maybe I should just be happy when I take this mic,
Take a pause from reviewing, and from games and from life,
And shed some sensible sentiments and supplementary insights...

Yeah... I could just be THAT GUY.
I could just be me, myself... and I.

Inktober #28 - The Groove, The Search

Yeah! Here comes the beat... Cyberdevil... S3C!

I'm closing in! Inktober's growing the dopest things
Rolling in grooves by both nouveau kin and old friends,
I've beginning to move like most trends, from way back,
Like Diamond Rimz up on a Benz they play back.

Hey! This life is my street!
I ride to this beat! I try new techniques!
There is so much lying I've mind to complete!
So much unreleased dope shit and musique! Oy vee!

But I still don't know what I want to be!
I'm still stringing on the beads of my swiveling feats,
Trying for nimble physique, trying to kill off habits,
That hold me back! There's that old black magic!

Is it clear to y'all I want to be an emcee?
Nothing's clear it's all scary to me,
Putting your life on the line, putting it all on a card,
You'll go far if it's the right one but how do you start!

How do you try if you don't? How do you vibe with your heart?
How do you know if you're smart? And if you're wise then you... aren't? Huh?

But I'm closing in! Inktober gave me the ropes again!
To vent, get bent and poke at things
I notice in the world that stir me, it's been great learning,
I go to bed early (Yeah right!)

It's a test of self-discipline too,
Can you do what you have to if you do what you do?
Can you doodle on a pad too? Can you make it all backwards?
Can you handle whatever bad things life throws at you?

Full force short trips and a forklift course
Over full time work that dwarves you short. Saps your energy.
Y'all better remember me! If ya'll ever try to do the things I did!
With an open mind! Open eyelids! See the future! Try to find it!

Don't keep on wanderin' the road that's timeless!
Give me the mic yes and I'll ignite it.
Give S3C drums and he'll be quite pressed.
Percussion. You know. High-hat lo-fi kicks ayy thy best.

Yeah man dope stuff... really dope yo...

Inktober #27 - Squeaky Sunday

Yeah! Let's go... let it squeak... let us flow...

HOTSTUFFDX! With Cyberdevil wild as ever!
We got the dope beats foes better leave us
Alone! No BS. In the land of the trees and the free,
Where cold winds poke at my feet uh

My bad turned the verse to the chorus.
But I'm glad we got so much going for us!
Musical skills at will you can't floor us,
Bassline gritty and grim, and I record stuff.

Face time, even little is important!
We chase all the wrong things, and they devour us!
On a daily grind but what's really worth it?
What do we want deep down not on the surface?

HOTSTUFFDX! With Cyberdevil wild as ever!
We got the truth! In the booth, let it loose, I'm confused,
With these tune shifts don't know what I want to do,
But I'm a prove I can move with any kind of grove, yeah...

Become a household name. Notorious.
This life's bright right? It's glorious.
In the future they'll be telling our stories.
We're the kings right now. Tyrannosaurus.

And I mean humankind.
We think we matter. Matter over mind.
Don't mind the money just go and get running,
And you might get something, feel great stunning.

It's not about what we have.
It's about who we are. It's about how we act.

I think I said that in an earlier song.
So just keep on right? And you can't go wrong.

I think I said that in an earlier rap.
So just keep on right? And don't ever... look... back.

Inktober #26 - Positivism

Hey, hey, heeeeey! Heeeeeeeey....

Positivism for a change.
I want to fill a page with just everything that's great.
I'm waiting on a plane. I'm waiting on a train.
I've got a lot of time to play games when I wait, hey!

Positivism for a change.
I want to shed some light on the good all entails.
Like when it's raining hail. You can polish your nails.
You can paint 'em black and dotty and it won't fade. Hah!

Positivism for a change.
A change is a good thing to have when you're broke!
And these days we don't need a gum or a smoke!
So we can keep all that money ain't no joke, yo!

Positivism for a change.
If you're at rock bottom, then you can't get lower!
And if you're still falling, then it will be over!
And if you're just calling, and no one will answer.
You'll save a lot of time and money and maybe cancer.

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